Just some insults i made a while back. Thought id share em with ya.
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<in>insult!</in>
<out>Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras.</out>
<out>Yo mama so fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly she put the boogie man out of buisness</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly she was a guard at Snake Mountain</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly Tony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday.</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly she scared the stitching outta Frankenstein.</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly we had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her.</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly her shadow gave up.</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats.</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly instead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck.</out>
<out>Yo mama so ugly they gave her a middle name...'accident'.</out>
<out>Yo mama has green hair and thinks she's a Tree.</out>
<out>Yo mama has wooden boobs and breast feeds beavers</out>
<out>Yo mama got so much hair on her upper lip she has to braid it</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid I told her drinks were on the house...so she went and got a ladder...</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she noticed a sign reading 'Wet Floor'...so she just did!</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid when you were born, she looked at your umbilical cord and said, "Wow, it comes with cable too!"</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she asked for a refund on a jigsaw puzzle complaining it was broken.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she got locked in the Quickie Mart and nearly starved to death.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she sold her Car for Petrol cash!</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she once attempted to commit suicide by jumping off a Kerb.</out>
<out>Yo mama so old she left her purse on Noah's Ark.</out>
<out>Yo mama so old she still owes Moses a dollar.</out>
<out>Yo mama so old when she was at school...there was No history class!</out>
<out>Yo mama so old when I asked for her ID she handed me a rock</out>
<out>Yo mama so old the fire department are on standby when you light her birthday cake</out>
<out>Yo mama so old she sat in front of Jesus in 1st grade</out>
<out>Yo mama so poor that your family ate Cornflakes with a fork to save milk.</out>
<out>Yo mama so poor when I visited her trailer, 2 cockroaches tripped me and a Rat tried to steal me wallet.</out>
<out>Yo mama so poor she waves an ice lolly around and calls it Air conditioning.</out>
<out>Yo mama so poor burglars break into her home and leave money.</out>
<out>Yo mama so poor she watches television on an Etch-A-Sketch.</out>
<out>Yo mama so poor when I saw her kickin a can down the road I asked her what she was doing....'Moving' she replied.</out>
<out>Yo mama so fat when she step on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'...</out>
<out>Yo mama so fat she sat on a Nintendo Gamecube and it turned into a gameboy</out>
<out>Yo mama so fat NASA plan to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer</out>
<out>Yo mama so fat she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm...</out>
<out>Yo mama so fat she make olympic sumo wrestlers look anerixic.</out>
<out>Yo mama so fat when she farted she launched herself into orbit.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid I found her peaking over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 days to make Microwaveable Pot Noodles.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she invented a silent car alarm.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she really thought the cinema was selling Free Willies...</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she was born on Halloween and can't remember her birthday.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she lost her shadow.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she somehow got fired from a Blow-Job</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid she thought Hot Meals were stolen food.</out>
<out>Yo mama so stupid when I asked her to purchase me a Colour TV she asked me...'Which colour?'</out>
<out>Yo mama so old her birthday expired.</out>
<out>Yo mama so old when Moses parted the Red Sea, he found yo momma fishing on the other side!</out>
<out>Yo mama so old she got the first copy of the Ten Commandments.</out>
<out>Yo Grandpa so old his social security number is 000-000-001</out>
<out>Yo Priest so old he's got Adam and Eve's autograph</out>
<out>Yo Archeology Professor so old we found cave drawings of her.</out>
<out>Your Wife getting so old she startin to fart out Mummy dust</out>
<out>Yo Doctor so old he uses chewing gum as a bandaid.</out>
<out>Yo hairdresser so old she used to cut Betty Rubble's hair</out>
<out>You so old you used to gang bang wid the Flintstones</out>
<out>Yo' home helper so old she was once a waitress at the last supper</out>
<out>You Gardener so old she uses T-Rex dropping as fertilizer.</out>
<out>Yo History teacher so damn old he was co-author of the Dead Sea scrolls</out>
<out>Yo Bookie so old he offered odds of 4 to 1 on Adam eating the apple</out>
<out>Yo Poppa so old and ugly they call him Captain Caveman</out>
<out>Yo sister so old she's more ancient than everything seen on the Antiques Road Show</out>
<out>yo' Mother in law so old she the only one at the old folks home with a senior citizens discount.</out>
<out>I told yo big sister to act her own age...and she died.</out>
<out>You Dog so old it farts out dust.</out>
<out>Your Girlfriend's so old, she invented the term 'oldest profession in the world'</out>
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