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DESPERATELY SEARCHING for ways to make itself seem more wholesome in the court of public opinion, after embarrassingly having been found guilty of anti-competitive behaviour for the third time, Intel has published a Corporate Responsibility Report to highlight all of the good things it does when it's not too busy freezing competitors out of the market.The report highlights all the wonderful stunts Intel has pulled to get publicity for addressing social and economic issues, the environment and education, and it promises to continue trying to distract the world from its dodgy business practices through more of the same in the future.In rather banal, trite fashion, the huge chip firm promises to make "innovation and growth" a "strategic priority" in the next few years. As opposed to stagnation and shrinkage, we assume.As if a full back-slapping report wasn't nauseating enough, Intel CEO Paul Otellini also chimed in to add a dollop of cheese to the mix, emphasising the importance of "engaging employees to apply technology and expertise to tackle serious challenges." After all, how can one go wrong by doing things that are good for business and benefiting the world? Sheesh, we don't know. Ask the EU. Or Korea. Or Japan."Despite today's economic downturn, Intel's commitment to corporate responsibility is unchanged," said Michael Jacobson, Intel's director of corporate responsibility, likely whilst mentally subtracting $1.45 billion from the corporate salary budget.Jacobson added that the future will bring a number of opportunities for Intel to be a good corporate citizen, waxing lyrical about global challenges such as climate change, the digital divide and "access to quality education and health care."Key highlights in Intel's 2008 report included having trained six million teachers worldwide to teach kids about Intel products, an Intel Foundation IOU for $120 million towards maths and science over the next decade, support for foreign education and the deployment of Intel classmate PCs in 46 countries, where presumably the not-for-profit One Laptop Per Child project (OLPC) can now pack up and go home.Environmentally, Intel wants you to know it has bought itself outstanding green credentials which it has had printed up on recyclable paper and framed. Chipzilla boasts that its purchase of $1.3 billion in renewable energy certificates (REC) back in January 2008 makes it the largest purchaser of green power in the US, although the amount of power that represents is less than 47 per cent of the firm's electricity use.Buying RECs, incidentally, also works out a whole compost load cheaper for Chipzilla than choosing green technology to meet its insatiable appetite for power. But it's nice to know Intel cares, even if it doesn't care quite as much as Google, which invests directly and heavily in renewable energy sources to meet its future power needs.A rather alarming statement in the report claims Intel has "reduced its freshwater needs by three billion gallons per year". Reduced by three billion gallons?! What on earth was it reduced from, 300 billion?Intel also claims it will be investing "over $5 million on more than 30 projects in an effort to save at least 30 million kWh of electricity and 750 therms of fossil fuel each year in operations." First one to get out their calculator and solve what that might actually mean wins a prize. The company also waffles on about being "on track to meet the goal of reducing absolute emissions 20 percent by 2012 from a 2007 baseline," an annual improvement of just four per cent.Something truly noteworthy in the report, however, is its statement that 54 percent of Intel's employees donated 1,346,471 hours of community service to schools and nonprofit organizations in over 40 countries last year. What the other 46 per cent were doing while most of their colleagues were out helping others is beyond us, but it is an admirable statistic all the same.Also worth a mention is that the Intel Foundation shelled out $8.5 million in matching grants for schools and nonprofits in need of funding.So, no, it's not all bad Intel, but Chipzilla still has a ways to go before the bitter taste of antitrust might disappear.